The round plug has no flat sides at all, it's as if it was machined round, I ran a metal prob around it and it feels smooth. You can't tell from that pic, but the insulator is actually shorter on that plug than the others, and the metal body is deeper, so definitely a different plug. My correct plug socket just spins around on the dodgy plug, there's no sign of it grabbing on any part of the plug, which confirms what I can feel with the probe.
Unfortunately we only have one car and are rural, so I can't afford to do it myself as if anything goes wrong and I need to get parts, I have to wait for them to be couriered, which could mean days, which we simply can't be without a car for. I did think about using a purpose made tool to remove it, but if I break the plug and still can't remove it, I'm kind of stuffed. I will get the mechanic to quote on a quick head swap, but not sure how common heads in good condition for these are, not many wreckers yards around here.
Re performance, when I swapped the first 3 plugs, we then did a 120km round trip. On the way out it struggled to get up one of the larger hills, but on the way back there was definitely more power, and today it was feeling a lot more like it used to, so seems things are coming good with the new plugs, at least on 3 cylinders, so I think this last cylinder really needs to be done, unless I can win lotto and buy a new suby!