I thought the electrical connector in the engine compartment would be the easy part compared to the actual sensor. I need to reuse the connector as I bought a Bosch universal one. How does the gray connector come apart. I pushed in with a screw driver on the little tabs and used a needle nose plier but nothing seems to make it separate.

 

96 Outback:-\

Well, my '02 has a grey connector with an unusual way to undo it. No idea if it's the same, but if it is...

 

...the grey part is "hinged" on one end (the non-sensor end), and swings out of the way like a door, once you compress the tabs. Then the connector unplugs easily.

 

When you re-install, make sure the hinged part is seated properly on it's round projections (the pivots/hinges). It comes off of those pretty easily when the "door" is open.