TheLoyale

The ************ Volcano asks:

I used to have a major problem when I was younger with what I call a "million wiper". I think you know what I'm talking about. You wipe and you wipe and you just can't seem to get clean. Finally, after using half a roll of toilet paper, three million wet wipes, and washing your bung hole out in the sink, you leave with a sore, itchy rump roast. This went on for years until one day about two years ago when it suddenly stopped cold. What causes million wipers in the first place? And why would they suddenly stop and start happening at random? Note: I stopped eating red meat two years ago because of iron toxicity. (If I spelled it right!) Maybe this had something to do with it but I don't know how.