05 Gold Outback: My wife parked under a tree and the resultant stains from birds above seem to have been cooked into the clear coat! The debris washed away but no amount of scrubbing, even compounding, got it clean. Any suggestions short of an arc welder would be appreciated.

Have you tried a clay bar? Meguires sells a kit with the clay bar and the lubricant and it has worked well for me to remove etched stains in the paint. However, I have seen bird dookey eat through paint if left on too long. Sometimes I wonder if those birds are on a diet of super glue.

Put cyanide in all berry bushes within 20 miles, it could be a family fun weekend projet.

Put cyanide in all berry bushes within 20 miles, it could be a family fun weekend projet.

Yeah, but then you have to deal with dents from all the dead birds kamikaze'ing your Subi!

Perhaps if you made friends with birds . . . get to understand them . . . try to reason with them?

Tell your wife to avoid all trees whenever possible, especially on a hot day in direct sunlight. Instead of finding solutions to the problem, why not avoid the problem altogether?