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Wow I’m sorry. That’s an atrocious set of circumstances. Hope you’ve got good people and ways to cope. That’s crazy people target a hospital, wow. The relay is down by your left leg up under/behind the dash. I think it’s to the side, like above where your left edge of your left foot is I’m unsure if they make any that fit Subarus but there are Bluetooth relays you can just use your phone to give permission to start I assume there’s an automated proximity option, but haven’t used one I would be looking into this if I were you. Keep the old relay in the vehicle somewhere in case the phone was lost or bricked Popping the hood isn’t ideal as anyone watching can probably tell what you’re doing and where you’re doing it.